Column: Barry Peters

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There are some days when it just doesn’t go to plan...

I have trouble opening things in the kitchen. Yes, the dishwasher (before anyone pipes up), but milk, orange juice and space-saving cartons of pulses top my list.

I’m a fairly intelligent man. I have some strength in my hands. I have decent co-ordination. Many of the attributes you imagine would come in handy.

But if a CCTV camera had been pointed at me on Saturday in my Bury kitchen, it would have seen decimation and humiliation.

The day started badly. Usually, a calming cup of tea and some sort of juice gets the weekend off to a relaxed start. But first, the orange carton decided to hit back at me. I’ve never got on very well with those pull-spouts and the juice just went everywhere. They will still be mopping it up in 2015.

Moving on to the tea, now with sticky hands, and the glued-on shiny lid just was not going to budge, Eventually, I pierced the top with a satisfyingly sharp knife – how do people with little dexterity or no strength get in to these things?

Finally, the evening’s chilli demanded some red kidney beans. Cue another carton, this time with a helpful dotted line and a ‘tear here’ instruction. Try as I might, it wasn’t going to tear so my teeth had to came to the rescue.

But my pain was eased on Sunday when I spotted new fridge packs of Heinz Baked Beans in Moreton Hall’s Sainsbury – with a screw top lid. Now that’s my sort of packaging...

I AM officially a cheapskate. There’s no other word for it.

Last weekend, I enjoyed the good weather in the garden and the wonderful West Suffolk Country Fair’s flying display for free (they came up close and personal over my house).

This weekend, I enjoyed both Friday night’s Status Quo tribute act and the Saturday night fireworks from the Thurston Festival.

Thank you to the organisers of both events – now, let’s hope Lulu cranks up the volume for the AbbeyFest in a couple of weeks...