This week’s poems are by Jean Batram and Wilf Daniells.
NEW PET AND BULLY CAT
A hamster in the house – the sheer audacity!
Staring from your cage at me – I’ll bet you taste like mouse.
My missus gave me quite a pat and said ‘Don’t look at him like that,
He’s our new pet – don’t you forget, you great big bully cat’.
My word I’ve caught some mice – out prowling late at night,
And when my whiskers touch your nose, I’ll give you such a fright.
You hop about and stare me out – so cocky, so I’ve thought, I’ll curl up now and have a sleep and dream that you I’ve caught.
-- JEAN BATRAM
I can’t resist a ready meal
Although at times I seem to feel
I should resist the hiss I hear
When ready’s time is getting near
I think I should cook for myself
But ready looks good on the shelf
The tempting pictures swell my heart
From peeling spuds I now depart
Not to be a kitchen slavey
Boiling veg and making gravy
No greasy plates to scrape and wash
Just dump the packet, squash, squash, squash
Into the bin, if it’s a sin
At least it helps to keep Me thin.
-- WILF DANIELLS